I am Sam.i.am
Hi I'm Sam the host of Heal w/ Sam. It's an honor to be on this platform CPS breaking news I admire Darren as a person as a producer leader parents
Themed birthday parties – Pirate Treasure hunts, a Circus with a petting zoo, Disney princess sleepovers, a Hawaiian luau. I was the room mom bringing goodie bags to my kids' school. I was the mom yelling "Tag, you're it!" in the backyard, then making lemonade and happy-face snack trays from fruit and crackers. I was that kind of mom. And I miss it. I miss the laughter in our home. But most of all, I miss being called "Mom" a thousand times a day.
WHEN DOING MY BEST WASN'T ENOUGH
One year after leaving my violent abusive ex for good, I found myself standing at the entrance of a family-centered homeless shelter. We were greeted by the director who showed us around & went over the rules.. to help relieve our anxieties of our unfamiliar ‘new home’ So he explained all the things we could expect.. and he told us what he expected too..
I didn't want to be at a homeless shelter, there was a time in my life when I thought I was too good. As I was embracing my new found humbleness, I chose to see the shelter through the same eyes my kids did- I could see their wonder & acceptance, no judgement.
I could also see their eagerness for change. Ya know early in my parenting journey, I realized~ “OUR CHILDREN TEACH US JUST AS MUCH AS WE TEACH THEM”
Our history
Going to the shelter felt like the best decision under my circumstances. They offered housing & daycare assistance, while help finding a job—all things I needed to start over🏡 I presented my new plan to my children with confidence & enthusiasm. I had to stay strong for them. And I was strong, I was a survivor. 💪
THE ILLEGAL REMOVAL
Shelter life wasn’t ideal, but it was safe, and I believed we were on our way to something better. Then, the second morning there came & everything changed.
After dropping off my two oldest at school, I returned to the shelter to find CPS waiting. They ripped my 3-year-old and 18-month-old from my arms. And my 2 children at school that day.
I never saw under normal circumstances again
The six months leading up to arriving to the shelter, my ex had called CPS 15 times with false allegations. Fourteen investigations were closed as "no services needed." The fifteenth, already proven false, had only opened eight days prior and hadn’t officially closed yet.
Because of that technicality—an open investigation—CPS exploited my vulnerability. I now know the removal was illegal. But that day… the shelter I had just entered feeling empowered & like a good mom & survivor.. I left feeling broken, 💔
I was overwhelmed with confusion, worry, panic & scared- just as anyone would imagine it was devastating.
I could feel the darkness creeping in, an emptiness questioning my entire existence.
When CPS took my children, they placed them with my abuser. He had been absent for six months. He had a history of violence, substance abuse, and neglect. He once told me directly that he was using our kids as weapons to hurt me.
He knew when he made the false reports that if he kept calling, one day it would stick. Maybe I'd have a messy house. Maybe I’d be holding a glass of wine. Maybe someone with a record would visit me. He knew CPS would twist anything they could against me.
Eventually, I was labeled "high risk" – not because of who I was, but because of how many times they were called.
The FINALITY of ADOPTION
Today the one thing we all know: my children are gone. I don’t know where they are or how they're doing. I don’t know who they're around nor who is raising them. And the one thing Im sure we can all agree is I am never comforted.
Adoption is final. It severs the legal bond between parent and child forever. No matter how much I heal, pray, grow, or fight, under our current system, there is no way to get my family back.💔
So why are we applying permanent solutions to temporary crises?
Why This Happens
1. The system is broken — vague but true. This answer is easy for people to accept without facing the full reality.
2. Kids for cash- harder to swallow but real adoption incentives and quotas do exist
3. Good moms are losing their kids- terrifying to face ("you can't handle truth")🎬 Children are illegally removed to fill quotas, not to protect them. This truth makes people very uncomfortable. If this fact is accepted as true then that means 'if it could happen to me, then it could happen to you'.
The children are the victims. The children are the ones society wants to protect. Right? Children are four times more likely to be abused in Foster Care than in their own homes. Statistics also show 80% of children in foster care did NOT come from abusive homes.
The SYSTEM That PUNISHES Vulnerability
Today I’m a homeowner. I’ve held the same job for almost 4years. I’m living a stable, responsible life and have committed to my healing. I’ve overcome every obstacle meant to destroy me.
But I’m still a mother without her children. So why doesn't my family get a 2nd chance!!
Because adoptions are FINAL.
And the scariest part? There is no solution in place in our country-- Nothing has been set in place •to make judges follow the Constitution •to hold the ones accountable who have & are violating parents rights.. nothing set in place to •incentives keeping families together •abolish fostercare and the list goes on & on. There's no comforting solution (YET!)
Vision for Change
I believe in a world where:
>CPS informs parents of their rights.
>Investigators wear body cams.
>Court decisions are based on evidence, not narratives.
>Case managers uplift families instead of destroying them.
>Adoption is the last resort, not the first.
> actually I believe if a parent •shows up to their Court hearings and to •every visit that>> TPR shouldn't even be on the table as a possible outcome and like I said it' should never be the solution to parenting!
Because what we have now is a system that:
>Removes instead of supports.
>Punishes instead of empowers.
>Silences instead of listens.
>And worst of all, it treats parents like criminals and enacts the most lethal punishment of all: Termination of Parental Rights.
The INVISIBLE SIDE of ADOPTION: TRAUMA
Adoption is celebrated with "gotcha day" photos and matching T-shirts.
But what had to happen first?
A family broken.
A bond severed.
A trauma inflicted.
Even infants show signs of separation trauma. Adoption doesn’t erase that pain. It adds to it. It forces children to rebuild identity around a story they never chose.
What Needs to Stop🛑
>Stop surveillancing and silencing parents.
>Stop stripping them of their constitutional rights
>Stop praising agencies that fail families.
>Stop pretending adoption is a happy ending.
Because for many, it begins with silence, shame, and unanswered questions. And there is no garuntee of how it's going to end. I'll spare you the statistics of what happens to foster youth as they exit the system.
My children ended up in the fostercare system. The parent who CPS placed my children with, he abandoned them the same month I completed the last and final step of my case plan-- acquiring my own home (independence)!
Once abandoned CPS placed my children in fostercare 💔 They opened a new case on me -claiming it to be my third case which equals automatic TPR- CPS & FAMILIES FIRST NETWORK & ther DEPENDENCY COURT JUDGE treated me as though I was the one who abandoned them, when I had been clearly fighting for them for 2 years & never missing a visit..
Several other corrupt acts happened, including by my own attorney, the court appointed conflict Council assigned to represent me and my case, my attorney did NOT do their job- My own attorney violated me also and betrayed me~ which all led to four months later me being served with motion to terminate my parental rights.💔
The system is corrupt & should be abolished. Until then my purpose is to spread awareness b)c I believe it's the first step toward a REVOLUTION💣💥
Let’s rise. Let’s heal. Let’s abolish this beast and rebuild what is right, fair, and sacred.
And once & for all establish everything in… ~the best interest of the child ✌️💛
Let me know in the comments if you've been affected by adoption and don't forget to watch the hill with Sam show every Saturday at 8:00 p.m. on the CPS breaking news channel
💖Sam
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